Autumn

I love autumn. It is my all time favorite time of year. It heralds cooler temperatures, the hibernation of bugs and other unseemly things like snakes and such, and the beauty of colored leaves. The grass and plants slow in their growth so you aren't having to spend every weekend mowing or pruning. It's football season and sweater season and time for Halloween and Thanksgiving - my two favorite holidays. And because it is cooler, it's the time of year I am willing to venture outside.

This year, I decided that we can decorate for this season. Why not. We decorate for Christmas. I feel like decorating and celebrating the long awaited autumn. I replaced the entry florals with autumn florals and a decorative pumpkin. The dining room center piece and linens sport colored leaves and gourds.

The outside of the house hasn't been done yet but I have BIG plans for that. We need a pumpkin, or two and mums. Who doesn't like mums? Need yellow ones, or orange ones, or red ones. And then there is the wreath.

As the mother of a 4-year old I have to let Little Man have a suggestion about the décor. He LOVES the decorative pumpkin and carries it around the house. He loves the bobble-head ghost to distraction and destruction. His suggestion this year: "Mama, we need to make the house pretty outside like we do for Santa." So, we will. As soon as it stops raining.

I'll post pictures when it's done.

Not My Kind Of Tree

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www.freedigitalphoto.net

I like trees. Oak trees, maple trees, elm trees, cherry trees, aspen trees, all kinds except sweet gum trees which produce those annoying spikey balls and make me sneeze all spring. Yet even they are tolerable in comparison to the worst tree of all - phone trees. Phone trees are just evil. They are evil because they give you hope and then let you down, disappoint you, and in the end, the branches come crashing down and you are no better off than you were.

My recent experience:
Recording: Thank you for calling. For English press one. Para Español marque el nueve.
Me: *press one*
Recording: Thank you for calling. Main menu. To track the status of your order press 1. To change your order press 2. To pay your bill press 3. To report a problem with your widget press 4.
Me: *press 4*
Recording: If the problem is the color press 1. If the problem is the sound press 2. If the problem is the size press 3. For all other problems press 4.
Me: *press 4*
Recording: Your call is important to us. It will be answered in the order in which it came. Many solutions can be found online at www.widgets4u.com on our frequently asked questions page.
Me: *humming to the muzak*
Recording: Your call is important to us. It will be answered in the order in which it came. Many solutions can be found online at www.widgets4u.com on our frequently asked questions page.
Me: *humming to the muzak*
Recording: Your call is important to us. It will be answered in the order in which it came. Many solutions can be found online at www.widgets4u.com on our frequently asked questions page. 
Me: *humming to the muzak*
Recording: We're sorry but your request cannot be processed at this time. Thank you. *click*
Me: &*%$#@!%&@#

Two calls later and relentless pressing of the 0 did eventually get a person to answer the phone. Who, as it turns out, was as effectual at solving the problem as the phone tree was. However, the human was able to send out a technician who fixed my widget. The worst is when you are asked to input your account number, address, phone number, social security number, date of birth, mother's date of birth, father's date of birth, address of your first grade teacher's home currently and at the time she was your teacher, etc. And when you finally do and the person answers your call they ask you for the information all over again. Really? You don't have that? Then who was I giving it to?
 
The thing is, customer service is supposed to be service for the customer. I know this because I looked it up. But what customers want is not "service" we want solutions. We want our problems to be fixed. Quickly. Cheerfully. We only want to give our information once. We want a person to answer the phone.

Alone Time

Photo by LeeAnn Rhoden

The new project at our house is a tree house. My husband and Little Man have been working on it together. It is being built between two trees in the back yard. Right now it is just a deck roughly 5 feet off the ground. It will have a ladder, a slide, a railing, a house with windows. Husband and Little Man
spend long hours together outside working on it. Husband is teaching Little Man about flat-head screw drivers and Phillips screw drivers, drill bits, screws, hammers and all sorts of "man" things. He also taught Little Man how to climb up and down the ladder that leans up against the open deck.

Lately Little Man has been spending his evenings hanging out with Dada. He "helps" my husband build fires in the fireplace, "drive" cars in the family room, use the remote control on the TV, work on the computer, whatever. I love that they are spending time together. I love to watch them play or just sit next to each other. I love that Little Man will climb up next to my husband and give him a hug.

What it means for me is that I have more alone time. After years of nursing, feeding, changing, bathing, dressing, potty training, rocking, soothing, and teaching I am almost at a loss with how to spend my new found free time. I find myself waiting for the Little Man to need me or something but he is even going to his father to get him snacks and sippy cups. So I sit, and wait, and watch and waste the time I now have.

And while they are outside together I have quiet time. I used to have quiet time all the time before Little Man came into my life. I didn't think much about it or notice really that I was alone and the house was quiet. Now, after years of spinning in every direction and being at the beck-and-call of another tiny person the periods of solo quiet are almost disturbing.

I'm sure that I will fill my minutes with more productive activities like completing my novel's revisions, finish knitting that sweater, complete the needlepoint project, and start French cooking. I've already taken on a ghost writing project. My guess is that this first twinge of aloneness is a precursor to empty nest that will come all too soon. My mother warns that with every age there is a new expression of independence until one day my Little Man will forget to say bye-bye when he leaves the house. Something I'll just have to get used to.

In the meantime, it is day 2 of Lent and meatlessness. Last night we had vegetarian stuffed bell peppers. Tonight we had eggplant parmesan. I looked at Little Man's chicken nuggets with lust, but I managed not to eat any.

It Takes Two to Tangle

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autumnscolorfulleaves.BlogSpot.com

Little Man's new favorite movie is Tangled, the Disney adaptation of the Rapunzel fairy tale. He likes the chameleon, Maximus the horse, the action, and the music. He's too young yet to appreciate the subtle humor, the love story, the tragic loss, or the allusions to other pieces of classic literature and jokes. I'm not usually one to like the revisionist versions of classic fairy tales that Disney puts out since they tend to dilute the stories or change them so that their original moral value is all but missing. But this one doesn't bother me as much as others. I actually like this movie.

While we were watching it today for the third time in a row, I discovered that I have a soft spot for Mother Gothel. She is supposed to be the villain in this tale, but I find that she is more of a tragic character that villainous. And she reminds me of Cher in Moonstruck. See?


Image from gaiaonline.com

Image from collider.com





 

 

 

 

 

Anyway, I read on someone's blog, well, several different blogs actually, that the antagonist/villain is the hero in their story. I watched the movie from the point-of-view from Mother Gothel. She is an old woman who discovers the magical flower from the sun that restores her youth. The flower is harvested to save the queen but now Gothel will surely die of old age. When the queen delivers a baby daughter with the healing, glowing hair, Gothel visits the babe to take only a lock of her hair in hopes of restoring her youth. The hair doesn't work once it is cut so Gothel then takes Rapunzel with her. It isn't until Rapunzel's eighteenth birthday does our action begin.

 

Yes, Gothel snatched a baby away from her parents. Yes she kept her locked in a tower. Yes her motivation was selfish. But what really happened? She didn't harm the baby. She fed the child, clothed the child, taught her to talk, walk, read, write. Gothel would even travel for days to bring back the special paints Rapunzel liked. She made Rapunzel feel loved and safe. In the end, she meets her demise - a justified one because she does turn to manipulation and murder - but all she wanted to do was to stay young.

 



 Her story started me thinking once again about the revisions I've put off for far too long and what is the story of my antagonist? How can I make that more compelling? How can I make my antagonist more sympathetic? (It was very well done in the movie Falling Down) How can I get my antagonist's story and my hero's story to be more intertwined, more tangled? It's time to get back to writing.

Thank You Clarence!

Unless you live under a rock, then you know that today is Thanksgiving. This is my favorite holiday because it is a universal holiday. It doesn't matter your faith, your background, or anything else. It is simply the day to pause and be thankful for what you do have. I am thankful for my family, my friends, my fixer-upper home, and all the opportunities that come my way.

photo by LeeAnn Rhoden

Yes, I am cooking today. Sort of. I cheated by getting a pre-cooked rotisserie chicken from the store (I don't like turkey), but the rest of the meal I'll be cooking - mashed potatoes, gravy, squash medley, and stuffing. I made pumpkin spice cake from a recipe I got from my friend, Allison, for dessert and there is a cherry pie in the kitchen too. My husband surprised me with an early Christmas gift. He gave me a new coffee maker! I love it!!

The one thing I am truly thankful for is Clarence. Clarence is my guardian angel. He isn't a graceful angel. He's not the type that will prevent me from walking out in front of a bus by distracting me with a lovely pair of shoes in a shop window or serendipitously running into an old friend and stopping to say hello. No. Clarence will prevent me from walking out in front of a bus by having me trip over my own feet and spraining my ankle. Anytime something happens that is just too weird for words, I know it is Clarence doing what he does because shortly there will be a blessing in some form. Sometimes, it's hard to appreciate Clarence's methods. Sometimes I'd rather be distracted by the pretty shoes. But, alas, Clarence is just clumsy and, well, I get that.

Yesterday, Clarence visited me. I don't know if I was saved from something else that would have been catastrophic at that time, or perhaps in the near future, but he was definitely with me. It's Clarence's way. My day started out as usual - got my husband off to work, fed the dogs, got the boy up and fed and dressed. My morning was busy: going to the gym, returning a library book, going to the post office to pick up a package, going to the grocery store to get milk, ice cream, and the Thanksgiving chicken. Finally, at the request of the Little Man, a trip to Dunkin Donuts to get a donut and a chocolate milkshake.

It rained the day before. It rained all night. The roads were wet. I should have said "no" to the trip to get donuts. On the way home, Clarence came into my life. What happened? I hydroplaned in a left-hand turn, over corrected and continued sliding up onto a curb and into a tree. Yes, my beloved Mustang, my Eleanor, hit a tree. Hard. Yes, I know they don't handle well on wet roads. I know you shouldn't over correct. I know! Whatever. It happened.



Photo by LeeAnn Rhoden

How bad was it? Well, the air bags didn't deploy and the engine didn't even stop running and I had to shut it off with the key. Little Man did drop his milkshake all over the back seat and himself. He was crying about that and then suddenly very excited about the "broken car." The worst of it was I had to call my husband to come home from work. And I was extremely embarrassed to have traffic blocked by the tow truck. Oh, it's probably totaled because the front end collapsed, the radiator is trashed and the hood crumpled. I am sure there is more engine damage. Maybe it can be repaired. Maybe not. Either way, it's okay because we are okay. I don't know what Clarence's plan is. Frankly, he could've just left me a post-it note on the fridge. But the fact that no one was hurt, even the tree had just a few scrapes, lets me know that at some point, I'll see why he did this.

In the meantime, I'll give thanks for today, my family, my friends, the opportunities that come everyday with the sunrise, and for Clarence. What are you thankful for?

The Southern Tablet and Other Stuff

So this is November. November is a busy month. It is National Novel Writing Month, National Thankful Month, there's Thanksgiving, Black Friday, Christmas Tree lightings, Alabama plays Auburn (Roll Tide), and the beginnings of all things Holidays. Love this time of year!

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Best part of holiday season? Food. I LOVE food. I'm not a cake/pie/cookie person but I do like gravy and mashed potatoes, and hors d'oeuvres, and stuffing, and casseroles, and soufflés, and wine. Ummmm..... This could be why I need to hit that place, what's it called? Oh yeah, the gym. *pout*

Another outstanding thing happening this November is the launching of a new literary journal called The Southern Tablet. The first edition makes its debut on Saturday, November 9th. Initially, it will be online only, but within a year there should be a print version as well. You can see the journal at www.thesoutherntablet.com. So, what's my interest in this? No big deal, I'm just Managing Editor. That and I have one story and one essay being featured in it. Well, everyone on our staff has two pieces featured. We will be accepting submissions beginning in January for our March issue. If you are interested in submitting, please see the website for the guidelines.

Also, this month we launched our accompanying blog called The Southern Tablet. You can find it at www.thesoutherntablet.wordpress.com. What is awesome about our blog is we are writing a round-robin novel in honor of our launch and NaNoWriMo. Each one of us chose a day to write a chapter of a story. My day is Tuesday. If you have a chance, check it out. Not just my entry, of course, the whole thing. It's really good and who knew that we were actually that creative! Then keep up with it until the conclusion.

What do you have going on this November, aside from catching up on our blog and breathlessly awaiting The Southern Tablet? Yes, I plan on getting back to my revisions on my novel. Things quiet down a bit after Saturday. Would love to hear from you!

What Time Is It?

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So, my husband and I joined a gym. Yippy. For those of you who know me, you not only heard the sarcasm in that "yippy" but you felt it too. Hubby likes to be active, so this is going to be good for him. Plus he says he wants to lose weight and get back into shape. I get that. There's a daycare for the Little Man so that's good for him.

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I don't like working out. There, I said it out loud. I don't like to sweat. I don't like to breathe hard. I don't like to "work it." I do not understand why anyone would want to "feel the burn" and it is not a good thing to feel sore the next day. Deliberately hurting yourself is called masochism. It is abnormal behavior and psychiatrists can prescribe medication for that condition. However, I do want to lose weight. I'd like to be the size I was when I got married, which yes, ladies, was the size I was in high school. I'd like to drop my blood pressure so I can be around for the Big Man and Little Man for another 30 years. God knows they need me. So, I'll try this working out thing.

This gym may not be so bad. First, it doesn't smell like a gym. Nothing worse than walking into a place and smelling sweat and bad breath. Yuck. This gym is air conditioned. I don't like to be hot, so I was pleased to see the A/C set at 63 degrees. They offer yoga at normal temperatures and best of all, they have treadmills and elliptical machines in a movie theater! So, I think I'll be able to find things to do and going there won't be too depressing.

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While we were being sold on the gym, the salesman health consultant said that if we made just 3 hours a week a priority, we'd see results. I guess he thought my priority was results. Actually, the 3 hours per week is what got me. I still don't know where I'm going to find 3 hours a week. If you know me, then you know that time is a HUGE issue with me so I started thinking about all the things we are supposed to spend time on during the week. After a little research, here's the list according to the pundits:


• Sleeping = 56 hrs.
• Personal hygiene (showering, teeth brushing, etc.) = 7 hrs.
• Food (cooking, eating, clean up for 3 meals per day) = 21 hrs.
• Work = 40 hrs.
• House Work (includes laundry) = 21 hrs.
• Yard Work = 4 hrs.
• Budgeting (includes paying bills) = 1 hr.
• Planning (setting up the next week) = 2 hrs.
• Errands = 6 hrs.
• Entertainment (TV, movies, etc.) = 14 hrs.
• Socialization (parties, conversation, etc.) = 4 hrs.
• Interactive time with the dogs = 15 hrs.
• Interactive time with the child = 21 hrs.
• Working out = 3 hrs.

Grand Total is 215 hours of things to do each week. The down side is that there are only 168 hours in a week so I'm short 47 hours each week. I guess I'll just have to give up sleeping to fit everything else in. What? You say I'm a stay home mom so I don't work? Wrong. I do work. I write, edit, do revisions, teach crocheting and knitting and we are days away from launching a literary magazine. I work from home. And I try to do all the other things I'm supposed to do too. Sometimes I succeed, sometimes I fail. What do you do during the course of the week? How do you spend your time?

Scary Things

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It's Halloween. It is one of my favorite holidays. In fact, it is my third favorite holiday. First is Thanksgiving, then the 4th of July, then Halloween. It used to be second but them Little Man was born on the 4th of July so I had to bump that one up. Anyway, I love to see the kids all dressed up. They are so cute! I love to see the families all dressed up together. It's fun. How wonderful to participate with your children that way. I love the left over chocolate. I never pass out sugary candy (I don't like it), just chocolate so I can eat it the left overs. There is nothing more fun than going to a costume party and having the house all decorated with Halloween stuff. On my bucket list is to host a Halloween costume party. Some day.

This year, Little Man and the Big Man will go trick-or-treating like they did last year and I will pass out candy to the kids who venture down our street. Little Man is going to be a pirate. He loves pirates. Pirates and cowboys. He has been carrying around his hook (plastic and part of his costume) and his belt which he calls his cowboy lasso. He told me he is a cowboy pirate. It works for him. Tomorrow, Little Man will be asking for his candy from the time he gets up in the morning until he goes to sleep. This will go on for days, or at least until my husband and I can eat it all so we can tell him there's no more candy. Mean? Not really. The last thing a 3-year old needs is candy. That's scary.


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Tomorrow is also the 1st of November. That means there are only 17 days until our anniversary (7 years), 28 days until Thanksgiving, 55 days until Christmas and 61 days until New Year's Eve. Throw in my husband's birthday for good measure too. Yikes! Menus must be planned, travel/guest arrangements made, gift lists need to be written for wishing and purchasing. All of that makes my hair stand up when I think what few days there are for making all these plans and arrangements. Can I eat chocolate now?

November is also a big deal because our literary magazine,
The Southern Tablet, launches on the 9th. That is more exciting than scary, but you never know what sort of reception it will have. The anticipation makes me chew my fingernails.

Finally, November is also National Novel Writing Month. I am partially participating in NaNo this year in that our journal staff each has chosen a day of the week to blog a round-robin "novel." I picked Tuesday and will have 4 installments to write for the whole month. Unless Allison delivers her baby early in which case I'll have Thursdays too. I'm still revising my novel and I still have a half-finished novel that needs to be completed so I don't think I'll start anything new. However, I am considering using the NaNo month to complete my revisions. Getting back to my writing schedule and discipline is what I need to do. Nothing creepier than being disciplined!

These are scary times, starting with today -- Halloween. From here on out it is a speeding roller coaster taking us up and down and around in all directions until the last champagne cork pops on New Year's Eve. Time passes too quickly and with all the things there are to do crammed into this short amount of time it seems to go faster and faster. It feels like taking that first step into a haunted house. You know your perspective will be skewed. You know that there will be things jumping out at you. You know that the passageways have been darkened and narrowed and there are sounds of banging and screaming from all directions to disorient you. Still, you take a deep breath, hold it, and run on through; stopping for nothing, and only exhaling when you've made it safely through the maze and have exited into a peaceful place.

Almost Isn't A Bad Thing

So, looking around at my home (inside and out), my writing calendar, my hobby bag, and my chore list, I'm pleased to announce I almost got things done. I seem to have difficulty meeting deadlines these days and I'm not sure why. After all I am hyper organized and I make my lists of things to do, checking the tasks off as they are done. Still, most items remain in the "in progress" stage - almost done but not quite finished.

I am almost done knitting my sister's sweater. I have the back completed, the right front completed and I am 4 inches into the total length of 38 inches of the left front. I just haven't had an opportunity recently to sit and knit without sticky fingers wanting to touch it or dog fur flying around or an active toddler wanting to "help" knit. I will get it done and it will be beautiful and I know that if nothing else, it will be a sweater my sister's cats will sleep on. But right now it remains almost done.

I almost made my word count on the novel I'm writing now. I picked up the novel I interrupted to write Murder at the Primrose Inn, reread it and started breaking it into chapters. I have 35,000 words to it already and my goal was to read it, do the chapter breaks, and crank out another 1000 - 2000 words on it. I will get to do it and it will be a good story when it's done (I like it better than the other one anyway). But for now, it remains almost done.

The gardening that we were doing this weekend is also almost done. There are a few vines that need to be cut out and a little more weeding that needs to be finished and then we will need to rake out the area and toss down grass seed. It would have been finished yesterday but we called it on account of the rain and a broken shovel handle. It remains almost done.

Our fixer-upper house is always in a state of almost done. The family room is almost done - the cable box and DVD player need to be put on a shelf and the cords tied up. I believe the hubby is holding out for a larger TV so he'll know where to put this shelf. We are working on the dining room. And we actually finished hanging the crown molding! And my husband actually finished mudding the walls. It is almost in a state where it will be ready to paint and have the furniture moved back in. It will remain almost done until we get a new chandelier. I'm holding out for a crystal one. We have big-ticket-item-itis.

As far as my chores go - I did manage to get the grocery shopping done. This will give me a few days of peace before the males start opening the refrigerator and pantry and telling me there's nothing to eat in the house. Or as Little Man says "I no like that." But the straightening didn't get finished and the laundry didn't get started. But it almost did.

In the past, I never had a problem meeting deadlines. Term papers were on time, deadlines at work were met, and tasks I set for myself were completed. Then again, I didn't have a husband I wanted to share a glass of wine with at the end of the week or a Little Man who'd crawl into my lap to cuddle.  The important thing is I will finish that sweater, even if it's with Little Man in my lap. I will finish my second novel and I'll start a third. The house is something we are building together and that's what makes it a home. So maybe, almost isn't a bad thing.

Spring Break?

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Here in Augusta, Spring Break coincides with The Master's Golf Tournament. Schools release and families flee the area to get away from the traffic. Some will rent out their houses for a little additional income. Having lived in the Orlando, FL area for close to twenty years, tourist traffic is of
no consequence to me. In fact, the "traffic" that these people refer to is NOTHING in comparison to Orlando near the theme parks.

What Spring Breaks means in our household is that Little Man is not in school and I have him for the whole week to entertain and keep busy and out of trouble. We have found a ton of things to do. Our week started with a play date with a new friend for both him and me. It was great fun to see him run and climb with a new
playmate! For me it was equally fun to talk with a mom who is closer to my own age, ahem, over
thirty-five. Even better, we share a similar background - being transplants to the area, growing up in the northeast, having been teachers, stay-home-moms now, later-in-life motherhood.


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It's Master's Week so the area does provide a number of fun activities for the residence who have stayed and, of course, the visitors. The park down the street from us is hosting concerts at the amphitheater all week. Yesterday during the day was Family Fun Day and we walked up to play on the rides and see the activities. Last night we chose to stay home and watch the fireworks through the trees from our driveway. Or, as Little Man calls them, boom stars.


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This is also attempt number 3 at potty training. This time I'm using the pants-free-zone method utilized by my sister-in-law. Yes, there have been a few accidents, but not many and not bad. He is at least making the connection between what he's doing and needing to be on the potty, even if it is an after thought. Little Man won't be 3 until July, and his school next year - which requires him to be potty trained - doesn't start until August so I still have 4 months to get it done.

The crown molding arrived so we can do more work on the redo of the dining room and on Saturday the dumpster comes so we can tear out the over growth in the yard. Yes, I will have to go outside. But I'm looking forward to the yard, at least the front yard, looking better.

It hasn't seemed like much of a "break" but then again, it has been fun. And by the end of the week, we will have accomplished more than I expected too.

What about my writing, you ask? Well, I'm still on break from Murder at the Primrose Inn before I start my editing. I am rereading the novel I have going with Emily and Bill and the psycho stalker (still untitled) so I can get back to writing it again, I have organized my writing notes and calendar and future ideas (even making notes on a novel that is germinating but still a ways away.) And editing for a couple of friends. I will finish those up before the dumpster comes. Enjoy your Spring Break!

What's For Dinner

As the mom of the house, I get asked daily "What's for dinner?" On the surface this does not seem like a complicated question and many times the answer is right there ready to go. Other times it is more difficult to answer. Dinner requires planning and if I haven't planned ahead, then I can't answer that question easily.

Cooking dinner requires ingredients and time. Ingredients require shopping. Shopping requires work. As the cheapest, sorry, frugal, person on the face of the planet I shop the sales and then I check to make sure I have a coupon for what's on sale. I shop at multiple stores. This one has "buy on get on free," this one accepts competitor's coupons, this one give you gas points and a discount at the gas pump. And yes, I do get a thrill of having coupons for "buy one get one free" stuff and a really big thrill when I can stack a store coupon with a manufacturer's coupon. And if I can do that with "buy on get one free" I'm in a total happy place! Squeee! I know, I'm a freak.

 As I was saying, dinner takes all sorts of planning. Once I know what ingredients are on sale, then I can begin menu planning. I can make meatloaf, or turkey tetrazzini, or chicken and rice. And I have to consider that meals need to stretch for leftovers (if I can get the Little Man to eat leftovers) and lunches for my husband to take to work. "Honey? Are you traveling this week? Or do you have customers visiting that you'll take to lunch?" I ask. "I don't know yet. I don't think so. I'll let you know. What's for dinner?" he replies. I remind you, I'm the planner and he is more spontaneous.

Then there is the time element. Sometimes I don't have time to do my due diligence with the weekly sales ads. Perhaps we've been working on a project in our fixer-upper house, or I'm busy knitting scarves for church, or Little Man is in full-swing terrible two's. Whatever the reason, sometimes dinner is scavenged out of the freezer and pantry. Tonight we are having hot dogs with macaroni and beef gravy! Or some such interesting concoction. And other times, dinner is take out from whatever restaurant is closest and has curbside service (a wonderful invention).

Writing is like dinner. To have a story you want to tell is easy but to have all the ingredients and time to write it down takes planning. And even with planning, sometimes things get in the way. Sometimes you are able to make your outline, plan your back stories, list your tensions, and block out your chapters. Sometimes you are scavenging and just writing by the seat of your pants. Other times there is no writing and it is just a day to read. Ironically, I write mostly by the seat of my pants and do my structuring and continuity during revisions. I do know my characters' back stories and list my tensions. Where the back story is revealed and when the tensions happen is entirely up to the flow.  Hmmm, I'm a spontaneous writer! But tonight we are having meatloaf.

Back to Normal??

The holidays are fun. They are a well-earned diversion from our mundane lives and by the end of the year, we need a diversion. The holidays are well-choreographed chaos beginning with planning family visits around EVERYONE’S schedule, the panic of choosing the right gifts for the right people and wrapping, bowing, labeling and shipping said gifts. It is the rush of writing the Christmas letter (yes, we are the annoying family that writes an update letter), addressing cards, getting stamps and mailing the cards in time for them to reach their destination before Christmas. It is the hunt for the perfect Christmas tree, the ornaments, lights, wreaths, garland and stockings hung with care. And feasting. We didn’t have one Christmas feast, we had three. We had the one when my parents came to visit (okay, we feasted at a restaurant), we had the feast when my sister came to visit and the one on Christmas Day with Nana. The holiday festivities are a huge, dramatic prelude to a short-lived climax and finally the “Thank you notes.” I do hope all of you wrote personal notes and didn’t send a mass text or tweet just saying “thanks.”

But now that the holidays are behind us and the last pine needle has been swept up, it’s good to get back to normal. There is a lot to be said for routine. I like routine. Everyone goes back to work and school and we have dinner at six. It’s comforting to know what to expect. But do we really know? Sure, the Big Man is back to work and the Little Man is back to his Play Care, but my car is leaving puddles of a mysterious fluid on the garage floor so it’s off to the shop for that. One of our big, yellow labs who chases the nocturnal thing on the fence every night precisely at 8:30 aggravated his hip. This morning he was stiff (sorry old man, you aren’t as young as you were).

As I’ve written before, I prefer to live in my planner without too much straying from the schedule of the day. My husband is more of the spontaneous ilk. We’ve both learned to adjust. I have learned to go to bed even if action items on my list haven’t been completed. My husband has learned to ignore my panic when he suddenly suggests we do something. He has also gotten better and will tell me on Thursday that we should take Little Man to the zoo on Saturday. To him that’s planning. To me that’s a whole rearrangement of chores and schedules (i.e. stress) but at least it gives me a few days to plan.

Life is constantly in flux and there are surprises that pop up out of nowhere that catch us off guard and make us say bad words that I don’t want Little Man to repeat in church. At least with a routine there is a framework, or scaffolding, to prevent us from falling too far off the cliff.

 

This is good to keep in mind for writing too. Recently, there was an excellent article in Writer’s Digest by James Scott Bell. He wrote about structure in our writing. Our stories, be they short or long, must have a structure to hang on – a beginning, middle, and end. Obviously there was more to the article than just that but basically that’s what we need to keep in mind. We may draft an outline, or chapter blocks, or jot a synopsis, but eventually, we have to put our story into some sort of order. What make our story interesting are the surprises of it. What do the characters do? How do they react? What is the “gasp” moment? And just to give you a little tid-bit about my novel, working title Murder at the Primrose Inn, the main character, Walter Martin, gets run over by his own car. You’ll have to read the book to see how that happens!!!

Or, Do You Say It Like This?

Res-o-lu-tion n. 1.The state or quality of being resolute; firm determination. 2. The act of resolving to do something.*

*The American Heritage Dictionary 1980

Or is it Re-so-lu-tion n. 1. The act of responding to a deficiency, again.**

**LeeAnn Rhoden 2013

The year is ending and a new one is about to begin. And with each turn of the annual calendar, many of us make New Year’s Resolutions. You know, “This year I’m going to work out four times a week,” or “I’m going to home cook all my meals and eat healthier,” or “I’m going to watch less TV and read more.” Uh huh, right. We may start out with good intentions and go like gang-busters throughout the months of January and February and possibly into March but then…

 

Then comes the warm weather and the kids are out of school, you go on vacation, it’s time to do yard work again, house guests come, you still have to get to your job, bills need to be paid, vet appointments, doctors’ appointments, that surprise maintenance item hits on the house or car or both, football season, autumn and outside winterizing, and with each thing that comes up it becomes easier to put off that trip to the gym, order that pizza, and flop on the couch with the remote control at the end of a busy day. Suddenly it is Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and we arrive right back where we started and what do we do? We make resolutions! Yes! “This year I’m going to work out four times a week, I’m going to home cook all my meals and eat healthier, and I’m going to watch less TV and read more.”

I don’t make resolutions. Why on earth would I tell myself how inadequate I am and that I need to change, sorry, improve? I have enough outside people telling me that. Doctor: “You should lose weight and eat better. It will be good for your blood pressure and cholesterol.” Mother: “You should get your hair done and get some new clothes.” Husband: “Honey, did you have a chance to do the laundry?” Little Man: “Mommy, poop.” Dogs: “Kibble again?” And really, aren’t the resolutions we make for ourselves the very things that fulfill the way others want to change us? I mean sure I’d like to lose weight but I don’t see how going to a gym is going to help me do this anymore aerobic housekeeping is. And I already cook pretty healthily. I guess I could go vegan or eat raw but, yuck. As far as reading more and watching less TV, perhaps. Will any of these things make me happier?

The last resolution I made was some fifteen years ago. I resolved to get organized. It worked! I had a place for everything and everything was in its place. I lived out of a day planner (still do not that it means anything). I would not go to bed until everything on my list was done. I had a laundry day, a shopping day, an errand day, a cleaning day. It was great! I love structure! And while I was single I could keep my life organized and scheduled down to the minute. I’m married now to a spontaneous type of guy. “Hey, let’s run over to the big-box hardware store,” he casually says. Inside I turn to ice and go immediately to my day book. Is it errand day? Did I forget to put something on my list? Can I squeeze in an impromptu trip? What will have to get bumped? How long will we be gone? What if this leads to another trip? And let’s not forget the Little Man who has his own schedule and agenda. And everything has a place but nothing is ever in it. Chaos! Am I happier? Absolutely.

For me, resolutions rarely work. A leopard cannot change its spots any more than I’m going to eat raw food. Personally, I think the best resolution you can make is to know yourself and to accept yourself for who you are.

So, what does all this have to do with writing? When writing our characters, we should take the time to get to know them. What is their backstory? Who are they? What do they believe? What do they think about themselves? Politics? Favorite flavor of ice cream? How do others view your character? Does your character accept himself/herself or does he want to change? And is it merely a want to change or an actual resolution to change. How does that work out for him? Interview your character. Write his biography. The more you, as an author, know about your character the better your writing will be. Remember, they are real people too with all the same quirks, idiosyncrasies, insecurities, and desires to be happy as we have.

 So, Happy New Year and happy writing!!

Friend Me

Technology and social media has made it possible for people from all over the world to connect with one another. It’s an amazing thing to be able to email, text, tweet, Facebook, Pinterest, instant message and let people know what you are doing and what you are interested in at the very moment you type it into your tech device. But the question that has been haunting me for several days is: are we really connected?

Initially, I was going to make a comment about Christmas cards in contrast to mass tweets/texts/emails. After all, it is that time of year. I was going to be a little snarky (love the word Allison!) and voice my opinion on how these methods of communication has made us lazy. After all, why put in the effort to individually let people know you care when you can just send a mass email? And by sending mass communications we have lost our individuality and become a collective and anonymous thus less important to one another. Really, when was the last time you sat down and wrote a letter to someone? And then I was going to bring it all back to the characters in my novel and their relationships to one another because I am writing a novel and I want people to read it when I’m done.

But in light of the horrible tragedy that took place on Friday the question of connectivity is even more important. Are we really connected? What we do with all our postings is outreach which is nothing more than marketing really. We are offering ourselves, our interests, our thoughts, our goings-on to the public at large. “Look at me! Look at me!” But do we ever really reach out? When was the last time you had a real conversation with a friend over coffee or lunch or sitting on a park bench? Or offered to help someone on a personal level?

We will eventually have the conversations about mental illness, gun control, community values, computer games and security procedures. That’s just great. But ask yourself why these things didn’t happen thirty years ago with the frequency they do now? What was different? What did we have then that we don’t have now? I suggest we had real connections with each other.

So this holiday season, while you are tweeting where you are eating your holiday feast and pinning the sweater your Great-aunt Fanny knitted for you, try to take some time to have a real conversation with an old friend or a new one.

Good Work!

I've been cheering my writer friends and acquaintances who have broken the 30,000 word (or more) barrier during NaNoWriMo. During this month, and I'm not participating, I've managed to break the 20,000 word glass ceiling and I can venture forth toward 30,000! Yes! Into the abyss I go!

Abyss? Yes, because up to this point I've had a clear picture in my mind of how my story goes. But, during the writing of my novel, the main character changed, one of his compadres changed, and weirdest of all the murderer in my novel changed and with that the motive. So now I'm following my characters' leads writing in a different direction than I first envisioned. I must say, their story is MUCH better than mine!

I try to explain to my husband that I'm listening to my characters, or waiting for my characters to tell me what to write while I'm sitting idle in front of the computer instead of cooking dinner. He is really supportive but he is of the analytical persuasion rather than the creative persuasion so he usually shakes his head and tells me I'm a geek and gives me a hug. That's fine, I learned a long time ago to embrace my geekhood. And as far as geeks go - math and science - need I say more?

So while it is quiet in the house - the husband is off to work, the dogs have been fed, the off-spring is asleep and the sun is not yet up - it is time to stare at the computer waiting for my characters to talk to me. I hope they're up!

National Novel Writing Month

Ahhh, fall! Football, cooler temperatures, World Series, fairs and festivals, Halloween, Thanksgiving and NaNoWriMo. What?! YES! It is NaNoWriMo time of year! National Novel Writing Month is the time when writers will lock themselves into their writing spaces and for one month, November 1st to November 30th, and attempt to write a novel of 50,000 words or more emerging only for a brief period to gnaw on a turkey leg and say hello to Uncle Joe and Aunt Fanny.

This is a great opportunity for writers to practice writing. It's like practicing scales in music. NaNoWriMo is not about proofreading or editing. It is not about using a dictionary or thesaurus. It is just writing. What you get, if you finish, is a rough, very rough, 1st draft. And in theory it is realistic to meet. After all, 50,000 words is only 1667 words per day.

The website for more information and lots of goodies is www.nanowrimo.org. You will see a whole list of published novels that sprang from this. Water for Elephants is one that comes to mind. Also, the rules are listed there but as a synopsis I borrowed this bullet list from Christine Powell Gomez on the Write Now Facebook page (a great group of writers and very supportive). Here is Christine's list:

•Write a 50,000-word (or longer!) novel, between November 1 and November 30.
•Start from scratch. None of your own previously written prose can be included in your NaNoWriMo draft (though outlines, character sketches, and research are all fine, as are citations from other people’s works).
•Write a novel. We define a novel as a lengthy work of fiction. If you consider the book you’re writing a novel, we consider it a novel too!
•Be the sole author of your novel. Apart from those citations mentioned two bullet-points up.
•Write more than one word repeated 50,000 times.
•Upload your novel for word-count validation to our site between November 25 and November 30.

You have 14 days to go buy you candy for Halloween, plan your menu for Thanksgiving, and get your outline and character sketches done!

I participated last year and have 30,000 words into an untitled novel that I will continue to work on until it is finished. This year I'm focused on completing Murder at the Primrose Inn so I will not be participating. However, for those of you who need encouragement, a cheering squad, a butt kicker, I'm here for you! Good luck!

So, I'm supposed to be writing but I'm having a hard time finding time. Does anyone else have this problem? Baby up from 11:30 pm to 2:00 am last night. We, my husband and I, get up at 5:30 am. My husband leaves for work at 6:45 am which is supposed to start my writing time. Baby up at 7:00 am wanting breakfast, but not feeling well.

Tuesdays and Thursdays the Little Man goes to Play School for four hours, which is writing time. Not today. Today he went to the doctor only to discover his crankiness was due to an ear infection. The doctor's visit (that took 2 hours) was followed by a trip to the pharmacy (half an hour) for antibiotic and the grocery store (45 minutes) for sick baby foods.

Finally it was nap time (possible writing time) but was struck with a migraine. I ended up napping with the Little Man until my husband got home. Then it's cooking dinner, eating dinner, cooking a second dinner for the Little Man who did not like the first dinner, cleaning up after dinner.

So, what happens now that it is between dinner time and bedtime? Writer's block! So, I'm throwing this out there to anyone else who has challenges (or a two-year-old) during the day that delay your writing time and how do you overcome your writer's block?